I'm going a waaaay back for the latest installment of FRAAP. This song was written when I was in my first ever proper band and was on our first EP release.
It was written a little while after my parents died and this was truly one of those therapeutic songs, where, at the time when I wrote it, I really didn't think about what I was writing and what it meant. It just came out of me because it needed to, it was a bit of a shaky mental health period.
When I listen back to it now, with the benefit of hindsight I can see it was about trying to accept what was past and a period in my life where I felt as though my life was on hold, and balancing that with looking ahead and trying to get over the hurdles of moving on and the fear what was ahead.
It was written on guitar with different chords and a different melody and when I took it to the band, they gave it a different melodic treatment, the resulting version sounds better than my original one. I love that its got a bit of a dreamy feel and thank goodness for Bob's voice, as I can't sing for shit and couldn't have done it justice the way I think he does (and that goes for all the songs I wrote while in this band). It was also renamed Amancer (which is Catalan for Sunrise) and I always loved performing this song because people who were hearing it for the first time were always initially thrown by the shift when the rap verse comes in (the shift is pretty representative of the chaos going on in my brain and emotionally at the time), but you'd always see them settle into it and love it by the end.
SUNRISE
Verse 1
Spectres flit into my mind and I can't decide if they're real
Try to reconcile with being lonely for a while
Appreciate this foreign state called happiness
I'm scared, and I couldn't care less,
I'm scared, and I couldn't care less.
Chorus
As the sun will rise, today another dies x4
Verse 2
Now that fear is gone, life has begun...come back from its holiday
Say goodbye, to barely living for a while
Emancipate, there is no fate, I'm satisfied
I'm not scared, and I couldn't care less
I'm not scared, and I couldn't care less
Chorus
As the sun will rise, today another dies x4
Verse 3
I see it but I know that its not there
This awareness means that I don't have to care
Can't close my eyes perpetual stare
Goose pimples on my arms raise the hairs
Between...madness and sanity is a thin line
In this mind there's no parity
No guarantee it'll be fine
Of this myself I must remind
Of this myself I must remind
Of this myself I must remind
Chorus
As the sun will rise, today another dies x4
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